Rambling...

It's pretty much a daily ritual in our house lately. After a tiring few hours in the morning of hurriedly finishing off my chores, I sit down for some quiet time but instead I'm flooded with a pile of books and plenty of chitter-chatter to drown the peace. Story time comes and goes and when I'm still yearning for that me time, I'm expected to turn all the recyclable junk, that has been painstakingly collected and looked after, into something splendid. Yes, you guess it right – it's craft time!

I automatically find myself hopping on to the computer and without thinking twice typing in to the google search bar for some 'inspiration'.... Heck, I just look for a quick fix I can get over and done with to keep those little fingers busy. Yes I do have my days when I'm enthusiastic and participate, but those are as rare as a blue moon, so we won't dwell on it too much.

While I was at the library this morning, browsing through the art and craft section while my 4 year old enjoyed her weekly story time session, it dawned upon me...and now it's official – google is stripping me of my imagination.

I had flashbacks of the time before I had my children. There I was sitting with a swollen belly yearning to hold the child in my arms and do all the wonderful things I had planned for us. Keeping them busy and stimulated and to make their childhood magical and exciting. Those day dreaming sessions of sitting down with her cuddling on the couch reading a story book and then creating masterpieces from scrap was something I was looking forward to. And now, here I am 4 years on, painting a completely different picture.

In the past, mums would sit down with their children and brainstorm about what they can create, and the process of deciding what to make in itself was a nurturing learning experience. I've realized that I am meant to savor and cherish these moments and make them last rather than treating them as chores that I want to tick off my list.

So this time forth, I would like to at least make an effort to change the way I do things, and put more 'life' into them. And yes me blaming google for something I am lacking is a bit far fetched, but I'll treat it as my consolation for now.

Quotes...

Ataa al Khurasani said: "I don't advise you to mind your life's affairs because I know that you are covetous to do so, but I advise you to mind the affairs of the Hereafter. Take from this temporary home to the eternal one. Consider this life as something that you have left, I swear by Allah you will leave it. Consider death as something that you have tasted, I swear by Allah you will taste it. And consider the Hereafter as a home that you have visited, I swear by Allah you will be there."

Dhu'n-Noon al-Misri said: "The ailment of the body is in sickness and that of the heart is in sins. A delicious meal cannot benefit the body when the person is sick and likewise, the heart cannot taste the sweetness of worship if it is full of sins."

`Ali ibn Abi Talib said: "Whoever has the following six characteristics does all that is required to make him enter Paradise and avoid Hell: to know Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala and obey him, to know Satan and disobey him, to know the truth and follow it, to know the falsehood and avoid it, to know the life of this world and renounce it, and to know the Hereafter and seek it."

Ibrahim al-Ash`ath said: I heard al-Fudayl saying: "Man's fear of Allah is equal to his knowledge of Him, and his renunciation of the life of this world is equal to his desire of the Hereafter. Whoever acts according to what he knows, Allah will make him successful in what he doesn't know. And whoever is ill-tempered disgraces his honour, religion and generosity."

Want all your past sins forgiven?

Recently I was listening to a lecture by Sheikh Kamal El Mekki (May Allah preserve Him) in which he spoke about how us Muslims tend to be very inconsistent with our Ibadah and always set high goals which we usually never complete. For example, fasting every Monday and Thursday, finishing the Qur'an once every month throughout the year, walking to the mosque for every salah etc. Yes, no doubt they're all good deeds, and should be done, but how many of us start off on such things in top gear and then burn out within a few weeks or even days? How many of us actually do this on a regular basis?

What we overlook is, apart from all these acts of worship, the Prophet Muhammad sallahu alaihi wa sallam has taught us different forms of ibadah which we can do in our daily life, and won't take much time or effort but will weigh heavy on our scales on the Day of Judgement, insha Allah.

Sheikh Kamal El Mekki gave the example of the dua that we recite after finishing our meal. Did you know that a person who completes his meal and recites this dua with true ikhlaas (sincerity), will have all his past sins forgiven? How many times do we eat in a day? Imagine reciting this dua a minimum of 3 times a day, think of the rewards you will accumulate. It only takes a few seconds to recite, and yet can have such powerful results, insha Allah.

So from this day forward, why not try to incorporate this into our daily routine and make an effort to recite this dua after every meal, insha Allah.

 الْحَمْدُ لِلَّهِ الَّذِي أَطْعَمَنِي هَذَا الطَّعَامَ وَرَزَقَنِيهِ مِنْ غَيْرِ حَوْلٍ مِنِّي وَلَا قُوَّةٍ
"
All Praise belongs to Allah who granted this meal, (which I received) without my power or effort".

All previous sins are forgiven if this dua is recited after meals.(Mishkat, Kitabul-li-baas)

Hide the faults of others and Allah will hide yours

'Abdullaah ibn 'Umar rad iallaahu 'anhu relates that the Prophet sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam mounted the pulpit and said in a loud voice: "O You who have accepted Islaam with your tongues, but in whose heart eemaan (faith) has not yet entered! Do not annoy the Muslims' nor revile them, nor seek out their faults. For whosoever seeks out the fault of his Muslim brother, Allaah will seek out his faults. He whose faults are sought out by Allaah, then Allaah will expose him, even if he is inside his house." Related by Muslim.

'Ubaadah ibn as-Saamit radiallaahu `anhu related that the Prophet sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam said: "Whosoever seeks forgiveness for the believing men and the believing women, Allaah will record for that person - equivalent to every believing man and believing woman -a good deed."
Hasan: Related by al-Haythamee in Majma'az-Zawaa'id (1/210) where he said: "The isnaad is jayyid."

Allah `azza wa jall says: “O you who have believed, avoid much [negative] assumption. Indeed, some assumption is sin. And do not spy or backbite each other. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his brother when dead? You would detest it. And fear Allah; indeed, Allah is Accepting of repentance and Merciful.” [Al-Hujurat 49:12]

Allah `azza wa jall ordered avoiding much of the suspicion because some of it is sin, and He followed this order with the prohibition of spying, pointing out that spying in most cases does not occur except due to bad assumptions.

The way of the Muslim – the general rule - is hiding others' faults and having a good opinion of others. This is why Allah `azza wa jall ordered believers to have a good opinion of people when they hear slanders of their Muslim brothers.

Allah `azza wa jall clarified the true position which every Muslim must understand. He said subhanahu wa ta`ala:

“Why, when you heard it, did not the believing men and believing women think good of themselves [i.e. one another] and say, 'This is an obvious falsehood'?” [An-Noor 24:12]” [Hisham Ismail As-Sini, Manhaj Ahl As-Sunnah wal Jama`ah fin Naqd wal Hukm `ala al Akhirin, Al Muntada, London, 1992, p. 21]

Dr. Mustafa as-Siba'i said, “Because having a good opinion and then regretting is better than having a bad opinion and then regretting.” [as-Sibai, Hakadha `allamatni al Hayat, al Maktab al Islami, Beirut, 1984, vol. 1, p. 42]

Taken from: www.islaam.com

Valuable Prophetic Advice

Ibn Abbas may Allah be pleased with him and his father, reported:

I was riding behind the Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam (on a beast) one day when he said to me, "O son, I am going to teach you some advice:


1. "Observe Allah, He guards you."
Obey his commands and avoid his prohibitions, He protects you in this world and in the world to come.

2. "Observe Allah, you will find Him ahead of you."
Observe the limits set by Allah and His Rights, He brings you to success and supports you.

3. "When you ask, ask Allah, and when you seek help, seek the help of Allah."
When you need a thing, ask Allah for it, and when you need help to accomplish any of your affairs, then seek the help of Allah, particularly in the things that only Allah can provide such as curing sickness, providing sustenance etc.

4. "And be certain that were the whole Ummah to collaborate to benefit you, they would never benefit you except in a thing which Allah has already foreordained for you, and if they were to collaborate to harm you, they would never harm you except in a thing which Allah has already foreordained against you."
This reflects deep faith in the Qada' and Qadar, it's good and evil consequences.

5. "The pens are lifted and the sheets have become dry."

6. "Recognize Allah at times of ease, He recognizes you at times of difficulty."
Fulfill the Rights of Allah and the rights of people at times of ease, He helps and relieves you at the time of your difficulties.

7. "And rest assured that whatever misses you, it would never befall you, and whatever befalls you, it would never miss you."
If Allah withholds a thing from you, it will never reach you. And if Allah grants you a thing, there is none to withhold it from you.

8. "And you should know that victory comes with endurance."
Victory against the enemy and the ego depends on perseverance and endurance. Patience is one of the greatest means to victory.

9. "And the relief comes through distress."
Distress that afflicts a believer, comes along with it's relief.

10. "And along with difficulty comes ease."

Source: Pg 40, Guidelines to Raising Children, Darussalam.

Stern Warning

Backbiting is speaking slanderously about an absent person. The Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam said:

"Do you know what is Gheebah?" They said: "Allah and His Messenger know best." He said: "It is to attribute to your brother what he dislikes." He was asked: "What do you think if what I say about my brother is true?" He said: "If what you attribute to him is true, then you have backbitten him, and if it is not true, then you have lied about him."

What is Nameemah?

Nameemah is to circulate slanderous rumours between two persons to damage or sever the ties between them. The Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam said:

"No Nammam will be admitted to Jannah".

Source: Pg: 22 Guidelines for Raising Children, Darussalam

Moderation is the Key

The Prophet (salAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam) said, "Allah (Subhanahu wa Ta'aala) has not created a sickness, but that He (Subhanahu wa Ta'aala) has created a cure for it - except for old age. So drink the milk of cows, because they eat from all sorts of plants"
[Recorded by an-Nasa'i, al-Hakim and others. Verified to be authentic by al-Albani, may Allah have mercy on him, in as-Sahihah and Sahih ul-Jaami]

In another hadith, the Prophet (salAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam) said, "Raise cows, because their milk is a cure (from disease) and their butter is a medication. Their meat, however, is (a cause of) illness"
[Recorded by Ibn us-Sunni, Abu Nu'aym and al-Hakim. Verified to be authentic by al-Albani, may Allah have mercy on him, in as-Sahihah]

I came across these ahadith a few days back and I decided to do some research to see whether what the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) told us so long ago, has been 'scientifically proven' by the medical professionals. Subhan Allah the wisdom and knowledge of our beloved Prophet (PBUH) was well ahead of that of the learned of our times.

I'd like to point out that the hadith doesn't necessarily say that red meat is haraam but instead reminds us to be cautious of our consumption of this type of meat. We all know the health benefits of red meat, especially now since it's been stressed on so much but what we tend to overlook is - moderation!

Excessive consumption of red meat can result in clogged arteries, boost blood pressure, and allow cancer cells to sneak past the bodies own self defense mechanism. Diets high in red meat are known to shorten life span & lead to diabetes, Alzheimer's disease, ulcers, pneumonia, influenza, liver disease, tuberculosis, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease and more.

Look after yourselves, follow a nutritious diet and a healthy lifestyle and make the most of what you've been blessed with. Good health is a blessing from Allah, don't take it for granted.

Reflections...

At one of the Al-Kauthar courses I recently attended the Sheikh mentioned that Allah has given us knowledge about the lives of the Prophets and Messengers of the past for a reason. We're not meant to just read it as a bedtime story to entertain ourselves but instead need to extract possible wisdoms and lessons from it. We need to use their life experiences to enhance our own. The more you read and ponder the more you will learn. Knowledge is a bottomless pit, you can never fill it to the brim.

We all know that Allah created mankind from clay. Ibn Katheer in his book (Stories of the Prophets) says:

"Allah choose clay which has the qualities of calmness, clemency, perseverance and growth."

The possible wisdom I extract from this piece of information is pretty apparent. Allah gave us freedom of will to the extent that we can refuse Allah's command. He grants us the freedom of denial, disobedience, and even disagreement with Him. His Kindgom will not diminish if the disbelievers do not believe in Him nor will it be extended if many people believe in Him. The disbelievers will lose and the believers will gain but Allah is above all of that. By choosing to reflect the qualities of clay in our demeanor we will be able to attain success both in worldly affairs and in matters concerning our deen.

Ibn Katheer also says:

"Allah created Iblis from fire which has the qualities of heedlessness, insignificance, haste and incineration. "

Iblis is arrogant, vain, disobedient and an outcast. He has been humiliated and disgraced and yet he is cunning and shows ingratitude. He is our eternal enemy. Man is hasty. When Allah blew the soul into Adam (AS) and he felt the pangs of hunger in his abdomen, he sprinted towards the fruits of paradise even before the soul had reached his legs. This is how we have been created. But that doesn't mean we do not have the will to persevere to change this within us. By succumbing to the whispering of Iblis we become nothing but reflections of him.

Everyone bears the consequences of their deeds. Allah knows the outcome of events before it happens but he does not force things to happen. He has granted free will to mankind and it's up to us whether we want to obey Allah and work towards attaining paradise or disobey Allah and become dwellers of the hellfire, like Shaitaan.

The choice is ours.

Answer to Your Supplication is Delayed for a Reason‏

There is an interesting situation that confuses many: the believer who is affliced with a calamity, and who then invokes Allah constantly, yet sees no signs of an answer to his prayers. Then when he comes near to the point of hopelessness, the true worth of his heart is found out. If he is pleased with what Allah (swt) has decreed for him, without losing hope of Allah's Favor, then in most situations it is at this point that such a person's supplications are answered, answered because his test is over: his faith has shined through and the Devil has been defeated. So it is at the time of near hopelessness that the worth of man is judged. This meaning is alluded to in the saying of Allah:

"Or think that you will enter Paradise without such (trials) as came to those who passed away before you? They were afflicted with severe poverty and ailments and were so shaken that even the Messenger (pbuh) and those who believed along with him said:"When (will come) the Help of Allah?" Yes! Certainly, the Help of Allah is near!" (Qur'an 2:214)

After Ya'qub (as) lost his son, much time elapsed, yet he never lost hope of relief. Instead of relief, another of his sons was then taken away, and even then he did not lose hope of Allah's Favor and Mercy:

"So patience is most fitting (for me). It may be that Allah will bring them all (back) to me, Truly He! Only He is All-Knowing All Wise". (Qur'an 12:83)

And similar were the words and sentiments of Zakariyyah (as):

"And I have never been unblest in my invocation to You, O my Lord!" (Qur'an 19:4)

Never, therefore, should one feel that too much time has passed by without his supplication being answered. One should realize that, whenever one is tested with hardship, one's mettle and faith are being tested. To pass such a test, one muct drive away the whispers of the Devil and then turn for help to the Most-Merciful, the Most-Generous the Most-Wise.

- Gems and Jewels, by Abdul Malik Mujahid.

Dealing with 'Attention Seeking Behavior'

Attention seeking behavior is often also about power. When your child engages in such kind of behavior, they are also implying that they, in that particular situation, have power in their hands, and there is little you can do about it.

Simply changing your reaction to such behavior can help nip it in the bud and also show them that you are in charge. Instead of giving them what they want, i.e. attention, minimising your reaction will get results.

Whenever possible, distract yourself and your child with another activity or simply walk away and let them deal with the consequences of their behavior.

In some situations, not intervening and letting the third party involved (in cases where they are in someone else's territory or comfort zone) deal with the situation themselves can work. Most of us often believe that we are always responsible for our childrens behavior and it is a reflection of our parenting. When your child is old enough to understand the consequences of his/her actions, it often doesn't require any intervention. The lesser attention you give, the easier it is to get them back on track.

For more tips go to http://parentingideas.com.au/

Profound Saying of Ibn Qayyim (r)

Ibn Qayyim (r) said: "When the slave wakes up as the night encloses upon him and his only concern is Allah and how to please and obey Him, then Allah takes upon Him to fulfill all of his needs and remove from him all that causes him anxiety. Allah also makes his heart free to love Him only, his tongue free to remember Him only and his body free to serve Him only.

However, when a slave of Allah wakes up when the night encloses upon him and his main concern is the world, Allah will make him bear the burdens of it's anxiety, grief and hardships. Allah will entrust him to his own self and He will make his heart busy, stealing from it His love since it will be preoccupied with love for creation. Allah will keep his tongue from His remembrance because it will be engaged with His creation; his body will be kept from obedience since it will be enslaved by its desires and services. And he will toil like a beast of burden toils in the service of another. And all who turn away from the worship, obedience and love of Allah, will be put into trial with the worship, service and love for creation."

Allah (the Exalted) says:

"And whosoever turns away (blinds himself) fromt he remembrance of the Most Gracious (Allah) (i.e. this Qur'an and worship of Allah), we appoint for him Shaitan to be a Qarin (an intimate companion) to him. (Qur'an 43:36)

Ibn Qayyim continues to say: "Seek out your heart in three situations:
-When you are listening to the Qur'an
-When you are part of a gathering of remembrance
-When you are alone and away from the world and it's distractions.

If you cannot find your heart in these three situations, then ask Allah to bestow upon you a heart, for indeed you are bereft of one."

The Seven Foundations

The life of a Muslim must stand on seven foundations:

1. Adherence to Allah's Book

2. Following the way of Allah's Messenger (pbuh)

3. Eating that which is lawful

4. Refraining from harming others

5. Staying away from sins

6. Repenting frequently &

7. Fulfilling the rights of others.

The Most Difficult Deeds

Ali (ra) said: "Amongs deeds, there are four that are most difficult to adorn oneself with:

1. Forgiveness when angry

2. Generosity in hard times

3. Chastity when alone &

4. Speaking the truth to the one that fears it. "

Death - Are You Prepared?

Hasan (ra) said, "No day passes without the Angel of Death looking upon people's faces, studying them five times, and those he finds engaged in merriment or committing sins, he exclaims dissapprovingly: "Poor, pitiable slave who is heedless of what is intended for him (death). Do as you please, for indeed I have for you a wink (of the eye) by which I will cut off your aorta."

The Many Guises of Backbiting

Ibn Taimiyyah (r) said that there are those from the people that backbite or listen to backbiting, and they do so to please the company they keep, with the awareness that the victim is likely to be innocent of some of the things that are uttered about him. Often such offenders feel that if they were to attempt to end such conversation in a gathering, their presence might become unwelcome or burdensome.

There are many methods and guises that are employed when one mentions another in a negative way.

- Under the pretense of being informative. one could say that it is not one's habit to mention others, except for the sake of relating another's condition to someone.

- Or one could state that by Allah, indeed so and so is one to be pitied thereby showing superiority over one who is to be rejected.

- Another method might be to say that so and so is a good person, however he has such and such qualities, thereby justifying himself in revealing another's faults.

- One could also simply state that we should forget so and so, and make supplication for their forgiveness as well as our own, intending only to belittle the one that was mentioned.

- There are those who backbite to raise their own status. When they hear of someone's error, they employ words like, "Had I not prayed for so and so last night in my prayer, the news of their sin would not have reached my ears."

- When a person states of another that he lacks understanding in a matter, the implication is personal superiority for the one that mentions the other's shortcoming.

- There are those that couple jealousy with backbiting - the act of being critical or belittling to those that are praised in the company of others.

- Some people also backbite for the sake of humour, playfullness and lightheartedness. A person finds a certain amount of satisfaction from being appreciated for his story-telling abilities; speaking ill of some one in a humorous fashion adds flavour to a tale.

- Some engage in backbiting by showing surprise and amazement at another's actions: "How is it that someone could do such a thing?" Yet others mention people and their actions with the pretense of sympathy for their actions or misfortunes. In reality, the one who backbites actually finds contentment and satisfaction at the mention of others and their misdeeds.

- Another form is relating someone's misfortune to their enemies, so that they too may find pleasure in putting them down.

In reality all these tactics are designed to try to deceive Allah and to please the creation, and in reality, the many that follow these methods only serve to deceive themselves.

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "A man might speak a word without thinking about its implications, but because of it, he will plunge into the Hellfire further than the distance between the east and west." [Sahîh al-Bukhârî (6477) and Sahîh Muslim (2988)]

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "Whoever can guarantee to me what is between his two lips and what is between his two legs, I can guarantee for him Paradise." [Sahîh al-Bukhârî (6474)]

Al-Hasan al-Basrî said: "Backbiting has three manifestations, all of which are discussed in Allah’s Book. They are: backbiting, tale-telling, and slander. As for backbiting, it is to say about your brother something that is true about him. Tale-telling is to say something that you have heard about him. Slander is to say about him what is not true."

Allah says: "O you who believe! Shun much suspicion; for lo! some suspicion is a crime. And spy not, neither backbite one another. Would one of you love to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would abhor that. And keep your duty (to Allah). Lo! Allah is Relenting, Merciful." [Sûrah al-Hujurât: 12]

Allah says: "O you who believe! Let not some men among you deride others who may be better than they (are), nor let women (deride) women who may be better than they are; neither defame one another, nor insult one another by nicknames. Evil is a bad name after faith." [Sûrah al-Hujurât: 11]

Allah says: "Woe to every sneering defamer." [Sûrah Humazah: 1]

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "One of the greatest of the major sins is to stretch out one’s tongue without right against the honor of a Muslim." [Sunan Abî Dâwûd (4877)]

Backbiting pertains to a disease of the heart. May Allah save us from this most evil of actions and protect us from it's temptations. Ameen!

Page 51; Gems and Jewels, compiled by Abdul Malik Mujahid, Darussalam.

Sound Advice

Advice of Jundub (ra)

- I advise you to fear Allah.

- I advise you to adhere to the Qur'an - for it is light in the darkest of nights and it is guidance during the day.

- Apply it, but if a trial such as poverty comes to you, give precedence to your religion over wealth.

- If the trial worsens, continue to put your religion before your wealth and your soul, for indeed the only one who is destroyed is the one whose religion is destroyed. The one who is poor is the one who has lost his religion.

- Know that there is no poverty after Paradise and there is no riches after the Hellfire.

**************

Ali Ibn Abi Talib (ra) said: "I advise you with five:

- None of you should hope except from His Lord and none of you should fear except his sin.

- None should be shy (when faced with a question) to reply humbly with "I do not know."

- And none should hesitate to acquaint themselves with the matter that they are ignorant about

- One should know that the patience to Iman is like the head to a body; if the head is cut off, the body perishes as well.

- Whoever desires richness without having wealth and abundance and without having a large clan, then let him turn from the depravity of sin to the honor of serving Allah."

*******************

Fudail bin 'Iyad said: "If you are not able to fast or pray, then know that you are shackled and confined by your sins." Allah (the Exalted) says:

"Yes! Whosoever earns evil and his sin has surrounded him, they are dwellers of the Fire (i.e. Hell); they will dwell therein forever." (Qur'an 2:81)

Ibn Mubarak said: "I saw that sins cause hearts to die, that base actions lead to their addiction, that avoiding sins is life for the heart, and that it is better for your soul for you to disobey it."

*******************

Hasan Basri advised some of his students admonishing them about avoiding the state of being proud. He said:

1. Do not deceive yourself into becoming too proud because you are in a good or righteous environment, for there is no place that is better than Paradise, and our father, Adam (as), experienced there what is known to all.

2. Do not become proud merely because you worship often, for consider what happened to Iblis (satan) after he spent a great deal of time worshipping.

3. Do not think yourself great because you have met with righteous people, for there is no man more righteous than the Prophet (pbuh), yet the disbelievers and hypocrites did not benefit by simply knowing him.

******************

Luqman (as) said: "If you are in prayer, take care of your heart; if you are eating, take care of your throat, if you are in another man's house, take care of your eyes; if you are among people, take care of your tongue. Remember two matters and forget two matters: Remember Allah & death; forget any good that you have done to another and any evil that was done to you by another."

The Slander Incident

All of us are aware of the slander incident that took place during the time of the Prophet [pbuh] involving his wife, Aishah (ra). While I was reading about this a few days back, four main point stood out to me:

1. The manner in which the Prophet [pbuh] handled the situation. He did not succumb to heresay but instead sought Allah's help and said to her, "If you are innocent, Allah will acquit you, otherwise, you have to beg for His forgiveness and pardon."

2. Aishah (ra)'s response to these words, "Should I tell you I am innocent, and Allah knows that I am surely innocent, you will not believe me; and if I were to admit something of which, Allah knows, I am innocent, you will believe me; so there is nothing for me and you except the words of the father of Prophet Yusuf: "So (for me) patience is most fitting. And it is Allah (alone) Whose Help can be sought against that which you assert" [Qur'an 12:18]

3. The revelation of Allah coming down at the decisive moment acquitting Aishah (ra) of all the slanderous talk fabricated in this concern. "Verily! Those who brought forth the slander (against Aishah (ra) - the wife of the Prophet [pbuh] are a group among you." [24:11]

4. The principal elements involved in the slander affair, Mistah bin Athatha, Hassan bin Thabit and Hamnah bint Jahsh, were flogged with eighty stripes. As for the man who took the principal part, ‘Abdullah bin Ubai, he was not flogged, either because the corporal punishment commutes the chastisement in store for him in the Hereafter, and he does not deserve this merit, or for the same public interest for which he was not killed previously. He, moreover, became the butt of reproach and humiliation amongst his people after his real intentions had been unequivocally exposed to all the public. [Sahih Al-Bukhari 1/364,2/696-698; Za'd Al-Ma'ad 2/113-115; Ibn Hisham 2/297-307]

Almost a month later, the Messenger of Allâh [pbuh] and ‘Umar bin Al-Khattab were engaged in the following talk: "Don’t you see ‘Umar if I had had him (Abdullah bin Ubai) killed, a large number of dignitaries would have furiously hastened to fight for him. Now, on the contrary, if I ask them to kill him, they will do so out of their own free will." ‘Umar replied "I swear by Allâh that the Prophet’s judgement is much more sound than mine." [Ibn Hisham 2/293]

Subhan Allah! The Prophet [pbuh] truly was a blessing from Allah (swt) to mankind. There is no problem in our life that we are faced with, except that there are examples from the Sunnah on how we are meant to respond to it.

Always Forgive Your Enemies, Nothing Annoys Them More

I've often come across this saying and always wondered what it truly meant. It's not easy to forget and forgive some one who has wronged you. It's human nature to feel anger towards some one who has caused you harm, either physically or emotionally or both.

We've been sent unto this Earth as a test from Allah (swt). Our every breath and every action should be done for the sake of Allah (swt) and to please Him. We have been created for the purpose of being a sincere slave to Him alone, and to worship Him in a manner best known to us. Everything else that follows is just a mere means of 'existence' to help us pass through this phase of our lives, yearning for a better life in the hereafter. Allah (swt) sent down the Prophet (pbuh) as a example for us to follow. The Prophet (pbuh) taught us how to implement the teachings of Islam and make it our way of life.

If you read about the life of the Prophet and how he handled different situations he was put in, there is so much we can learn. I'd like to share with you one of the many incidents that have touched my heart and have left a profound impact on my mind.

"In Shawwal, ten years after receiving his mission from his Lord, the Prophet [pbuh] set out towards At-Ta’if, about 60 kilometres from Makkah, in the company of his freed slave Zaid bin Haritha inviting people to Islam. But contrary to his expectations, the general atmosphere was terribly hostile. He approached the family of ‘Umair, who were reckoned amongst the nobility of the town. But, to his disappointment, all of them turned deaf ear to his message and used abusive language as regards the noble cause he had been striving for. Three brothers from the chieftains of Thaqeef —‘Abd Yaleel, Mas‘ud and Habeeb — sons of ‘Amr bin ‘Umair Ath-Thaqafy met the Prophet [pbuh], who invited them to embrace Islam and worship Allâh, but they impudently jeered at him and refused his invitation. "He is tearing the cloths of Al-Ka‘bah; is it true that Allâh has sent you as a Messenger?" said one of them. "Has not Allâh found someone else to entrust him with His Message?" said the second. "I swear by Allâh that I will never have any contact with you. If you are really the Messenger of Allâh, then you are too serious to retort back; and if you are belying Allâh, then I feel it is imperative not to speak to." said the third. The Messenger of Allâh [pbuh], finding that they were hopeless cases, stood up and left them saying: "Should you indulge in these practices of yours, never divulge them to me."

For ten days he stayed there delivering his message to several people, one after another, but all to no purpose. Stirred up to hasten the departure of the unwelcome visitor, the people hooted him through the alley-ways, pelted him with stones and obliged him to flee from the city pursued by a relentless rabble. Blood flowed down both his legs; and Zaid, endeavouring to shield him, was wounded in the head. The mob did not desist until they had chased him two or three miles across the sandy plains to the foot of the surrounding hills. There, wearied and exhausted, he took refuge in one of the numerous orchards, and rested against the wall of a vineyard. At a time when the whole world seemed to have turned against him, Muhammad [pbuh] turned to his Lord and betook himself to prayer and the following touching words are still preserved as those through which his oppressed soul gave vent to its distress. He was weary and wounded but confident of the help of his Lord:

"O Allâh! To You alone I make complaint of my helplessness, the paucity of my resources and my insignificance before mankind. You are the most Merciful of the mercifuls. You are the Lord of the helpless and the weak, O Lord of mine! Into whose hands would You abandon me: into the hands of an unsympathetic distant relative who would sullenly frown at me, or to the enemy who has been given control over my affairs? But if Your wrath does not fall on me, there is nothing for me to worry about."

"I seek protection in the light of Your Countenance, which illuminates the heavens and dispels darkness, and which controls all affairs in this world as well as in the Hereafter. May it never be that I should incur Your wrath, or that You should be wrathful to me. And there is no power nor resource, but Yours alone."

Seeing him in this helpless situation, Rabi‘a’s two sons, wealthy Makkans, were moved on grounds of kinship and compassion, and sent to him one of their Christian servants with a tray of grapes. The Prophet [pbuh] accepted the fruit with pious invocation: "In the Name of the Allâh." The Christian servant ‘Addas was greatly impressed by these words and said: "These are words which people in this land do not generally use." The Prophet [pbuh] inquired of him whence he came and what religion he professed. ‘Addas replied: "I am a Christian by faith and come from Nineveh." The Prophet [pbuh] then said: "You belong to the city of the righteous Jonah, son of Matta." ‘Addas asked him anxiously if he knew anything about Jonah. The Prophet [pbuh] significantly remarked: "He is my brother. He was a Prophet and so am I." Thereupon ‘Addas paid homage to Muhammad [pbuh] and kissed his hands. His masters admonished him at this act but he replied: "None on the earth is better than he is. He has revealed to me a truth which only a Prophet can do." They again reprimanded him and said: "We forewarn you against the consequences of abandoning the faith of your forefathers. The religion which you profess is far better than the one you feel inclined to."

Heart-broken and depressed, Muhammad [pbuh] set out on the way back to Makkah. When he reached Qarn Al-Manazil, Allâh, the Almighty sent him Gabriel together with the angel of mountains. The latter asked the Prophet [pbuh] for permission to bury Makkah between Al–Akhshabain —Abu Qubais and Qu‘ayqa‘an mountains. Full narration of this event was given by ‘Aishah [R] (the Prophet’s spouse). She said: "I asked the Prophet [pbuh] if he had ever experienced a worse day than Uhud. He answered that he had suffered a lot from those people (the idolaters) but the most painful was on the day of ‘Aqabah. I went seeking support from Ibn ‘Abd Yalil bin ‘Abd Kalal, but he spurned me. I set out wearied and grieved heedless of anything around me until I suddenly realized I was in Qarn Ath-Tha‘alib, called Qarn Al-Manazil. There, I looked up and saw a cloud casting its shade on me, and Gabriel addressing me: Allâh has heard your people’s words and sent you the angel of mountains to your aid. The latter called and gave me his greetings and asked for my permission to bury Makkah between Al-Akhshabain, the two mountains flanking Makkah. I said in reply that I would rather have someone from their loins who will worship Allâh, the All–Mighty with no associate." A concise meaningful answer fully indicative of the Prophet’s matchless character and the fathomless magnanimous manners. [Bukhari 1/458; Muslim 2/109]

(Taken from Ar Raheequl Makhtum; The Sealed Nectar, Biography of the Prophet [pbuh])

Subhan Allah! How many of us can say that if put in a similar situation we will exhibit the same amount of patience and trust in Allah (swt)? How many of us, despite being abused so much can make sincere dua to Allah (swt) to bless the offsprings of the wrong doers and bless them with the guidance of Islam?

There is so much we can learn and so much more we need to do to be the type of Muslims our Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) wanted us to be.

Have patience and trust Allah (swt) alone, and He will surely set your affairs in order. Forgive your enemies, for they know not, and a greater reward is in store for you in the hereafter, which is better for you than the rewards in this life.

Thought Processing…

Last night after much contemplation I decided to do what I usually wouldn’t. Many a times opportunities such as these have arisen in the past but I never mustered the courage to actually be a part of it all. But this time I told myself that things will be different and unless I let myself experience it I won’t be able to say whether it was a good or bad idea. It might sound like what I did was some mammoth task and when I do reveal what it was it might seem trivial to some of you but the fact that I haven’t been the type of person who is known to do something like this, makes it a big deal – at least for me!

I attended a ladies only dinner organized by the members of a forum I frequent and even though I spoke regularly with many of the lovely girls in cyber space, it was the first time I actually ‘met’ them in person. It was a great event and I thoroughly enjoyed myself. I was always nervous about going to such gatherings because there’s always the slight fear of whether you will ‘click’ as easily in real life as you do online. And let’s face it we tend to come out of our shells much quicker and easier when we’re sitting in the comfort of our home as opposed to having a face to face conversation with someone.

I think given the circumstances, I did pretty well - if I should say so myself! I even surprised myself a few times by cracking a few jokes (which actually made people laugh!) and also by initiating conversations, something I rarely do at a first meeting with someone. People who’ve known me for a while would find this absurd, because I can be quite a chatter-box but when it comes to treading on unfamiliar territory, I do have my initial reservations.

Getting together with like minded and similar aged people makes such a huge difference to the usual monotone life us moms tend to lead. We are so engrossed in our children and the whole job of making sure everything is running smoothly we let ourselves take a back seat. My brain is in dire need of some stimulation! Sitting down at that table last night and enjoying a warm meal without any interruptions felt amazing. It’s funny how we take so many things for granted but when we become parents we learn to be ever grateful for those little things that didn’t really matter in the past.

I sometimes miss the days when I led a carefree life, not thinking about anything or anyone else but myself. Every stage of our life we go through leaves us yearning for what we’ve left behind but what I’ve learnt is that instead of cribbing over what we don’t have it’s best to close that chapter on a happy note and move on and try to find contentment in what we have in this point in time. Yes being single was fun, but having a soul mate & being able to experience motherhood is a blessing from above and I wouldn't trade it for anything else.

This outing for me was like a breath of fresh air. Going away for those couple of hours and indulging in something I truly missed was sheer bliss. At one point I just sat there looking around the room and watched everyone indulge in conversation and the whole atmosphere felt so light and rejuvenating. When I got back home last night, I had renewed energy and the ‘oh! so boring’ routine didn’t seem so boring anymore. I was able to look at things in a different light and appreciate what I’ve been blessed with. Sometimes it so happens that you get engulfed by what you do day in and out it begins to feel burdensome. Little time-outs such as these help you refresh your mind & makes things seem so much better than before!

I thank Allah for everything he has bestowed upon me and ask Him for forgiveness for whining about the things that I should be grateful for. I thank Him alone for giving me this opportunity to re-assess my thoughts and helping me in bringing back the happiness and fulfillment I found in the little things I achieve everyday.

Toddler Rules of Possession

1. If I like it, it's mine.

2. If it's in my hand, it's mine.

3. If I can take it from you, it's mine.

4. If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.

5. If it's mine, it must NEVER appear to be yours in anyway.

6. If I'm doing or building something, all the pieces are mine.

7. If it looks just like mine, it is mine.

8. If I saw it first, it's mine.

9. If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically
becomes mine.

10. If it's broken, it's yours. 

(This was posted on the board in my child's kindergarten)